How to Spot an Abusive Relationship
Anyone can be a victim of dating abuse. Statistics show that 1 in every 3 teenagers in the US have experienced some form of abuse from a partner. It can be either physical, emotional, sexual or verbal abuse. When entering into a relationship, you need to be careful by looking out for signs of a potential abuse! What better way to stop abuse than to end it before it worsens? If you are suspecting about your significant other, here are ten warning signs you can look for:
Constant put downs- Is your partner demeaning you on a regular basis? If they are making fun of you or humiliating you in front of others, this is a clear sign of emotional abuse and could even translate into another form.
Extreme jealously or insecurity- Does he/she get very angry if you do something that makes them feel insecure in the relationship? Being extremely jealous is their belief that they have ownership over you.
Explosive temper- When they get mad, they are MAD. Are you feeling unsafe or afraid when they lose their cool?
Isolating you from family and friends- Yes, when you’re in a relationship, it is good to spend quality time with each other. But is your partner consumeing all of your time? Will they get upset when you try to hang out with other people? Do they complain that you don’t give them enough of your time, even if you think you do?
Big mood swings-Are they are unpredictable when it comes to their mood? Do they often have emotional outbursts; typically anger?
Making false accusations- Is your partner is blaming you for something you didn’t do? Does he/she try to make you feel guilty even though you are innocent?
Possessiveness- Is all your time going straight to your partner? Will they get upset if you give other people attention or care? He/she is wanting you all to themselves and refuse to share that time with people who you love.
Checks phone or email without permission- Are you constantly walking in on them goingthrough your phone or Facebook messages without your consent? This is just a sign that shows of their insecurity in the relationship. It’s another way for them to control little things you do.
Preventing you from doing what you want to do- Is your partner encouraging you to quit things you enjoy? Such as your job, sports and hanging out with friends?
Telling you what to do- You are finding that you are not making decisions for yourself anymore. They are all centered around what he/she is telling you to do. Are you making certain choices only to please your partner?
If you are finding that many of these warning signs are describing your partner, you may want to think twice about staying in that relationship. However, ending a dating relationship is not easy. Remember, you do not have to do this alone! Find a teacher, friend, parent or person that you trust and tell them you need their support. More than likely they will be eager to help! There are also safe places in the area (such as Henderson House in Mcminnville, Or) that are designed to help in these kinds of situations. Lastly, there are websites available (loveisrespect.org) that you can use to learn more about abusive relationships and even chat live with an advocate! Don’t just continue being in an unsafe relationship, take action and keep yourself safe!